Saturday, July 01, 2006Chapter 25: David And Failures
The other section was about David, which I listened to for awhile. I didn’t like it that he used to be a hunter of wild game. My father is a tiger and it seemed like the man shot plenty of these already- threatened species for show. Lestat was full of pathos as he related how he could not resist the temptation and bit him. “I couldn’t resist such a young body. Brown hair, tall, muscled though not like a bodybuilder, which is ugly. I used it for a while in my adventure. I loved him so dearly. He was very patient, and very good to me. I overpowered him. About to die….”
I looked up and bade my sensei to have a seat. He declined and walked to the other end of the room. “Prince, he was going to die? He got hurt?”
His voice lower, just above the wind. “No my love. He was 74 years old and always conscious of that. His wish had been to go to Brazil. (fangs bit down) I was afraid he’d die. I wanted to fulfil that wish. Bianca, am I wrong to do that? How he loathed and cursed me for making that decision----- to transform him into a monster! It was so stupid. Later, David returned and told me he forgave me. But because of that, the former general could not return to the Talamasca. Remember that place? It’s an organization.”
I waved. “Like Ghostbusters. Right?”
“Good girl. Oui. I always declare how I don’t regret doing such things in my bios. It is untrue. At times, I Want to reverse the. blunders I had made. How hurt I’d be if he still held that against me. David’s very stubborn,” Lestat emphasized, pushing back his soft fluffing hair. Some sweat broke out on his brow.
I understood. My friend still hates me. An abused child. I was afraid she’d die. She had an abusive father. We didn’t know at the time, when she came, her body always had many bruises! (a photo of her) I advised her to see the counselor, Lestat. But she told me she could cope. Then when she did not come for a few days, I got scared. When we heard news that she’d been sent to the Social Services (where the abused and the children with dysfunctional families are put), I went to see her. She slapped me and blamed me for that. I sniffed.
He was sympathetic. “I feel for you. You just wanted to help. But she obviously didn’t see it that way. Are you sad? Bianca, we try to be good, but we fail in the end. Do you think the angry will eventually let it go? I am pained when I think of my fledglings’accusing looks. I go through torment when they desert me.”
It was not the first time I connected with the strong vampire. We had failed our loved ones, wanting to help, but the effort paled in comparison to the original intention. Perhaps one day our friends would realize that we meant to be good to them and we did those out of love.
Lestat glanced down at the pure white tiles. Huskily, he said,“Come, child, let’s talk of lighter subjects.”
“Ok Mister. Tell me about… your mutt. See his picture?”
My companion was happy as he slipped out a picture of Mojo from his wallet, a tattered one. Seemed like 2 years ago. “I got an idea, why not I bring you to New Orleans? As a present. Think about it?” he persuaded in his honey-silky tones.
My earrings jangled. “You have already given me. Um…I don’t know if my folks are planning something.”
He gestured no problem. “Sure, go with them, if you’ve gotta plan. I was just thinking, it’s so Much better meeting him in person, Bianca-chan! (childlike, human) My boy’s very lovely. I cannot speak of him in words. He doesn’t hate anybody, except when he was chained up in the big house I found him in. No dog likes captivity. I was sick for a period of time and couldn’t take care of him, but Mojo didn’t abandon me. It’s 1130. Need to go home?”
I asked him not to fret and said I wanted to stay. Lestat was affected more than I realized.
“Why are you alone again? You are a family. Is Marcus there?” his voice became higher pitched, strained, creasing of the golden brows. A wave of grey pain.
“Stat, I’m alright. Why do you feel so sad?” I laughed and squeezed his shoulder. “I’m fine. Yea but as usual I can’t reach Marc when he’s walled up with football.”
He blinked and looked at the shiny rings on his index and third fingers. “Cherie, a family should be together, all the time. Pardon my frankness, I do not mean to interfere. It is a real pity, non?”
“Hmm, but I’m not resentful, Brat prince. When my parents leave, which is often, I’m expected to take care of myself and my bro. Now he’s older, I can relax. I used to have to cook and wash for him. Sometimes, yea I wish I could go and play with my pals.” I thought of the past and smiled. glad those days are over and gone with man! I’m going to travel and see the world by myself before I settle down.
The vampire leaned forward. “Why didn’t you? Go out. I would, in your place. Responsibility sucks. Then, I have a question. I want to understand you, like that night. Are you at peace?”
Definitely yes. I’m all right with it. No lies. Besides, I can be a kiddo here, and when mama comes home, she’ll let me be a child just for a while. She’ll cook and clean as per normal. ------ I answered happily.
Please allow me to take care of you, Little Bird. I want to. Louis and I really enjoy being your family. Tell me anything you want. I will pamper and spoil you children.
I folded my arms. “Haha, thanks but not domination ok? That is different, according to Louis. He says you try to run his life.”
“What? When did he mention this? How could you backstab me?” he whimpered. I shook my head.
“Now I’m telling ya. Anyway you’re bossy, wanting to find out what time we come back. And that time, you were just waitin by the door and pounced on us. Daniel couldn’t stop laughing coz of that. You totally made the comedy. ”
My friend jumped up, fuming (in a comical way, scowling handsomely). Then it faded away to giggling. He loves attention, even if it’s negative.
“I’ll Kill him! Don’t backstab me. What happened to frontal assault? Bianca, go it easy. I can try not to be, I don’t keep calling you every second right? I just worry when my juniors are out alone. And Louis is the kind that gets himself lost.” My sensei was quite hurt, but smiled and whispered loving French words to me. He cradled me. I fluffed up my feathers and felt his cold skin warm up.
Perhaps we weren’t entirely fair to him, for Lestat can be like a lion with his overwhelming paternal instincts. His constantness, loyalty to buds, willingness to impart knowledge. Lestat doesn’t mind if we get smarter than him. The most important lesson was to love him without holding back---- he demanded it. Absolutely! Repression is non existe when one meets this unforgettable persona. Lestat gives much more than what you would expect from a broken family.
I could not hold back my tears when he left for Switzerland. That is the reason why Artemis calls our people to build up our walls, so we will not collapse from trauma and fear.
All this time Louis was certain it was alright. Until Lestat began to feel relapses again in January. He felt sicker and threw up almost every alternate day, even though he’d been extremely careful about feeding on healthy people. Nevertheless accidents happened, Why didn’t he smell the alcohol? We had to steady Lioncourt when he stumbled in. He asked why we had cloned ourselves. Soaked through, must have fallen into the river. It’s hard to sight the river when your vision and senses are weakened.
“Don’t. I can too walk by myself,” the drunk guy said loudly, pushed Louis away. I went to get fresh clothes. When I came back with a blue shirt, Lestat was moaning, sprawled over a pooling black puddle. Leaned forward and vomited again, would have fainted dead into it had Louis not held him up.
“C’mon darling, lean against me. Don’t move.” Lestat obeyed and slowly regained his senses. We took each arm and pulled the man up on the couch. Lestat felt better when he tilted his head back. We sponged him. I was feeling a conflict, mad at the vampire for not being careful and pained at his agony.
Then began a series of stricken times. My beloved teacher was bedridden. He could barely leave his bed. On challenging days, he was retching in the washroom. But Lestat did not yield to the coffin, not listening to our pleas. Not even David whom he was willing to please.
In his bed, we continued with lessons. It distracted his pain and aches. “Hey I’m sorry. I’m too spent to make this energetic. Are you bored?” he said softly when we were doing a routine music theory lesson. I also leaned against the pillows beside Lestat, feeling comfy and bored. It was heartbreaking. I shielded my null mind and smiled.
“It’s ok.” I assured him. “If you’re tired, just sleep for a while. Time for your medicine.” I slipped off and shook the bottle. Made from magnolias, the aroma temporarily made its patient drowsy so that excruciating pain would be reduced. Lestat sighed, letting me spoonfeed him.
I wanted to help in the medical expenses, but since he wouldn’t accept, I slipped the cheques in his diary and David would use them. We had bought a wind-up bed to make the patient more comfortable, so he need not struggle to get up. The blonde was surprised we bought it without his permission, but didn’t say a word. He slept earlier at night.
It seemed to be useless to be an immortal, when there’s endless pain and you can’t die. This went on for two weeks when Prince of the vamps stopped being lethargic and overrode our concern. Usually the charming vampire wore his lace and silk suits, dressed always for visitors. “No pajamas unless I’m sleeping. Stop worrying! (pissed at Louis) Come, sweetie, sit with me.” And he entertained us with his antics. Definitely, positivity was great, since it lifted the dreary times.
Louis was concerned about that, since the patient expended lots of energy. I was too, but we couldn’t very well isolate him. Brattie almost collapsed when he tried to stand by himself. Luckily Quinn and Amadeo held him.
To my questions if he was ok, Lestat gripped my hand very hard. “Krys, I may not stop suffering. I want to tell you guys, so much; it deeply affects me. I feel so helpless. I Like being normal. Everybody is so kind and I appreciate this. If anyone’s listening… can you pray with me?” I agreed. We held hands.
He repressed his tears as he hugged me close. The stuffed toys lining the foot of his bed looked on. Thank you. Is it okay if you do not ask me that anymore? I cannot answer. Cherie, the herbs and tonics your friends brought are helpful, but not cures. I am aware of being too eager for a solution to this.
I hate Relixa. She shouldn’t have shot you.
A softness rarely seen in him showed: We’ve been through this, cherie. I do not feel anger. It was understandable she hates our kind. We are parasites. Her parents died because of my people’s mistakes. What’s done is done. Got to live with it. So cute, this Pooh bear. I don’t feel so painful today. I want to go downstairs.
Lestat tested his weight. I couldn’t hold his weight. Fortunately, he was strong enough to head down to the kitchen, and I grasped his hand. Normal. He could take care of himself.
Usually the post came at six. They subscribed to Reader’s Digest, National Geographic and some serious mags. Letters were rare. Until one letter arrived on Thursday.
Jesse. Louis raised his brows at her handwriting. The pen ink was fragrantly like roses.
“Typical of her,” he muttered. I asked who that was.
"Lestat’s girlfriend. They shared quite intimately for a bit. Why does she only showup now?It’s too late."
Oh. When we gave him her letter, Lestat sat up immediately and looked extremely excited. From lethargy to transformation of mood. We were ignored for the evening. How annoying! He must be her ex! ----- I grumbled.
Lestat was writing some sort of reply when I looked in on him. He smiled, flushed. “Wonderful. I can’t believe she replied me.”
So important that business letters were set aside in favour of replying her.
“Yea don’t sit up too much,” I sulked and left. I browsed Geographic, waiting for an apology but he didn’t. Online:
Elfin: I’m so mad! He’s so entranced by this Jesse woman. Who the hell is she?
Quinn604: Our Mother told us little. (enclosed a pic attachment) pretty. She didn’t come?
Efin: yea I bet she’s just Pretending. Lestat’s writing to her now. he’s ignoring me. We’re supposed to do something tog. How’s your studies?
Quinn604: Moping emoticon. Not good. I’m tired. I wake up early, u know my blood is different than the weaker ones. But still,so much. Neverending. Hey don’t be down. Sick person.
Elfin: don’t care. Sorry for interrupting, go do stuff now. or u won’t finish. Halfway, the vampire in California logged in again. He said he would opt for the longer time span. Then he could slacken. Haha.